Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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