So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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