At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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