Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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