everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
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