we have pet lesbian snakes
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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