Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I'm always down for nudity.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize