do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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