he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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