I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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