i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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