i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize