my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
last night I used snow as a chaser
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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