Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Randomize