I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize