Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize