thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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