Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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