I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
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i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
How's work?
Spinning.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
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I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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