The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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