we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize