I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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