Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
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she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
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Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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