She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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