hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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