Why does Corona taste like a burp?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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