We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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