Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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