This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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