my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
its liver damage thursday
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