Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize