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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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