So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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