we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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