the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize