I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize