Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i love accidental penises.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize