My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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