too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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