Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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