nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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