please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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