it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
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