she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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