i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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