eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize