I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I did not marry a roomba.
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