just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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