I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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