I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
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Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
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It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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